Friday, November 22, 2019

Six ways successful people stay calm in a crisis

Six ways successful people stay calm in a crisisSix ways successful people stay calm in a crisisIt happens to the best of us. Things go off the railsat work,you witness someone on yur team verbally explode because something isnt working out in their favor, or after too much frustration, you have a meltdown of your own.But before things go too far, heres how to stay calm on days like these.Dont lose itLosing your temper couldwreck your career. You risk losing the standing youve attained so far It tells your managers that you cant be trusted with responsibility, and it tells your peers that you dont have a handle on your own life. Plus, freaking out could make everything worse- not only for you, but also for your coworkers. When theres a crisis, everyone needs to focus on the underlying problem and row in the same direction to fix it - not cater to your mood.The hardest consequence Even if youre calm 99% of the time, people will always remember your one moment of losing control and i t will erase most of your goodwill with them. The person yelling in the office may make some people afraid, but it will also always earn a measure of contempt.So when you get wound up, acknowledge your emotion to yourself - I am upset right now, and I have every right to be - to get it out of the way and stop struggling with yourself. Then step back and think of your future, not just the present moment.One key thing that many wise people teach students of meditation if youre reacting to everything, you will get stuck in your life because you cant handle moving forward. If a simple challenge brings you to the brink of crying and fury, how do you plan to handle the larger challenges that go along with success? Start training yourself to meet challenges with aplomb instead of a tornado of emotion, and soon youll be moving forward to bigger and better opportunities.Donttry to take on others emotionsEmotions are as viral as illnesses. When we sit next to a happy person, were happy. Whe n we sit next to a drama queen, were tossed around in the chaos too. Handling our own emotions in addition to other peoples is too much of a heavy lift for most people, especially at work.While showing empathy and putting yourself in their shoes can help you put things into perspective and understand another point of view, assuming someone elses emotional burdencan hurt your productivity. It can be hard to set those boundaries, but its necessary we absorb each others feelings.Very often, when someone is upset about a work matter, there can be a tendency to want to cater to their distress. The best advice dont try to intervene if someone is lashing out while youre around. Its not your responsibility to fix someone elses emotional state - and in fact, it can do harm. Dont shrink from their anger, or cater to their ups and downs. If youre in the same workplace, it means theyre just like you grown adults who should be trusted to manage their own emotions and be in charge of their own l ives.Judith Orloff, M.D., provides strategies for getting away from others bad emotions from her book, Emotional Freedom Liberate Yourself from Negative Emotions and Transform Your Life,in a HuffPost article.First, ask yourself Is the feeling mine or someone elses? It could be both. If the emotion such as fear or anger is yours, gently confront whats causing it on your own or with professional help. If not, try to pinpoint the obvious generator. For instance, if youve just watched a comedy, yet you came home from the movie theater feeling blue, you may have incorporated the depression of the people sitting beside you in close proximity, energy fields overlap. The same is true with going to a mall or packed concert, Orloff writes.Remember, its all in how you communicateWhen youre angry, there can be a tendency to be sarcastic for some people, or passive-aggressive for others. Be aware of the intentions and emotions youre directing at other people. Not everyone is - or should be - u nderstanding or accepting of anger, ranting, or silence. You dont want to burn any bridges, especially if you dont know the colleague well and they could carry reports of your behavior through the company.Jacqueline Whitmore writes about the thinking through what you have to say before communicating in an Entrepreneur article.Once something comes out of your mouth, you cant take it back. Saying hurtful or nasty things can be risky or dangerous to your professional reputation. It can also shatter your credibility. Watch what you say, how you say it, and where you say it. Its best to confront someone in private, whenever possible, Whitmore writes.The obvious implications dont send flame emails, nasty messages on Slack or other internal messaging programs, or confront someone publicly where they may be humiliated. It will make you look terrible. If someone confronts you that way, just acknowledge whats happening I see youre angry right now, so its probably not the best time to address things. Im heading out. Why dont we take this up tomorrow and talk through our concerns? Then walk away. When you stay in the presence of bad behavior, its can be taken as encouragement for it.Focus on your breathingMindfulness meditation isnt just about sitting in a room with your eyes closed. It can also take the form of walking or nearly any other activity. The only requirements are being present to your surrounding, calm breathing, and focus.The Greater Good Science Center at UC Berkeley provides adviceon mindful breathing.Sometimes, especially when trying to calm yourself in a stressful moment, it might help to start by taking an exaggerated breath a deep inhale through your nostrils (3 seconds), hold your breath (2 seconds), and a long exhale through your mouth (4 seconds). Otherwise, simply observe each breath without trying to adjust it it may help to focus on the rise and fall of your chest or the sensation through your nostrils. As you do so, you may find that your mind wa nders, distracted by thoughts or bodily sensations. Thats OK. Just notice that this is happening and gently bring your attention back to your breath the site says.Remove yourself from the situationIf youre too heated, nothing good will happen. If youre around someone whos heated, its the same.Get away from the irritation as soon as you can (and do some of that breathing). Stepping outside and clearing your head on a walk, or just doing a lap around another floor, can help take your mind off things and get your muscles moving again. To calm down quickly, use this easy trick just think of the place where youre happiest, and picture what that feels like. It will put you in a different frame of mind. Youll be best when youre thinking clearly and not clouded by adrenaline.Think aboutwhat you can controlThe bottom line is that we get distressed when we are trying to control things we cant. Try not to waste too much of your precious time and energy worrying about things that are out of you r hands. You dont have to throw yourself in front of every work crisis with the idea of stopping it, or martyr yourself to a cause. Again, trust other people to do their part, and accept that they may do things differently than you do. The sooner you let go of what you cant control, the sooner you can move forward, and get focused again.

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